Since Hollywood is a melting pot of transplants from all over the globe, it is completely acceptable that we jump on the sudden World Cup-obsessed band wagon, especially if it gives us an actual reason to be drinking all day and posting on social media. So World Cup finals morning, after the initial clusterf*ck of group texts from everyone frantically trying to figure out what do to as if the world was ending, I finally decided that Rock N Reilly’swas the best option to watch the final World Cup match. Mostly because it was closest, and I’m on a severe Uber budget after my last $200 ride.
Unfortunately Uber tried to screw me again with their rude surge increases during peak Uber times, so I had to very politely beg my roommate to drop me off at the bar, 1.1 miles away. HA! Not this time Uber. After saying the magic words, “We have a table” our small group of friends suddenly increased to all of our friends in Hollywood, but there was one problem. We needed more table. Luckily some of the girls noticed that a guy and two girls were getting up from a table by the front window, and tried to swoop in to make a claim on the prime bar table real estate. Bad idea.
Who would yell at such sweet looking girls?? …a leprechaun.
Turns out that the guy who was leaving is a direct descendant of Reilly, the bar’s 12 year old alcoholic, asshole mascot who would put a sailor’s mouth to shame. The second they moved towards the recently vacated table, the poster child for Little Man Syndrome charged through the crowd of dainty girls and says in the most articulately obnoxious tone, “With all due respect, can you f*cking wait until we’re done? We didn’t even sign the f*cking bill yet!” After I located the tiny source from where such a big sound was coming from, I immediately understood why he would have such a problem with a group of ten pretty girls. With all due respect.
Well. Being the calm, mature adults that we are, we calmly tried to explain how; A. You can’t say “With all due respect” and then disrespect someone, and B. It’s a bar. You fight for seats. This further prompted Mr. Angry Leprechaun to get even more angry, resulting in the adorable term “silly bitch” to come into fruition as he hastily tried to insult one of my friends sitting closest to him. So silly.
I magically got ahold of a giant German flag and got it to wave blissfully in the air…
My inner Cuban was brewing inside of me but I decided to pull a psychiatric mind f*ck instead. “Hey! Unnecessary!” I said over him with a big smile on my face, “It’s World Cup Sunday, have fun, be happy, no need to be so angry!” I chimed, trying to squash it while insulting him at the same time. Didn’t work, he kept blabbing, so again, I politely chimed, “If I wanted to fight with an asshole for no reason, I’d still be with my ex.” But before he could unleash his fury on me he caught sight of another friend behind me flicking him off. Luckily it only resulted in him screaming, “C*NT” at her before running away, but I wouldn’t have been surprised if there was a shooting.
Anyway, Germany won. Yay – because I bet on them! And all peace and happiness was restored at the bar. Fattening food was eaten, obnoxious photos were taken, and everyone was ready to go home by 6pm. Oh wait, except for the person whose roommate got there at the end of the game and begged her to go with the British guys they had just met to XIV. Fail.
The theme at XIV was jungle…I collected all the animals and stole them.
Alyssa is a self-made, full time travel blogger who loves adventure and typically travels the world solo. She's been to 53 countries and 6 continents so far, and believes she has mastered the art of chasing waterfalls, traveling solo, wine drinking, and making budget-traveling look good. Curious to know how she started this career? Check out the About section above!