by Alyssa Ramos
I suck at dating. I’m not cutey, or flirty, or seductive. I won’t giggle and agree with everything you say, and I’m not afraid to make it known that I have big dreams, and live a bit of an unconventional life, that I f*cking love.
I’m not the always-sweet, always-pretty, “Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice” girl that always seems to be seriously dating someone. I’m not the girl that’s easy to introduce to your friends or colleagues with a simple name and title, because I’m not exactly, “simple”, at all.
Essentially, I’m just not dating material.
Essentially, I’m who you’d travel the world with.
But since most people think you need to start at the bottom with dating, work your way up to marriage, then maybe think about taking some trips together, it’s hard to find someone else who’s at the same level as me. A relationship would never work with me if the guy is just “dating” material. I need someone who is “travel the world with” material. Here’s why.
You’re Either Unsure or All-In
I’m not looking for someone I can coordinate meals with at a restaurant a few times a week. I’m looking for someone who can eat whatever, whenever, as long as it either involves wine and working from laptops, or being in another country. Preferably both.
You’re Either Supportive as a Provider or as a Partner
You’re Either Someone’s or One
I don’t want to be someone’s, “This is who I’m dating”. I want to be someone’s “We travel the world together.”
You Don’t Need a Trial-and-Error Period
A big difference between someone who is just “dating material” and someone who is “travel the world with” material, is an instant bond, a natural feeling of trust, and an un-ending desire to share everything with each other. You don’t just feel like this is someone you want to have drinks with, talk about your work day to, and show off to your parents so they stop bugging you about when you’re going to settle down.
It’s the Highest Level of Commitment
Traveling the world with someone is a major commitment, and if it weren’t for the legal paperwork and pressure that marriage requires, I’d say it was a bigger commitment than marrying someone. You’re not only lovers and best friends, you’re partners, who can regularly function together without getting bored, grossed out, or uninterested.
It’s a LOT Harder to Find
But regardless, actually finding someone you want to travel the world with can be half the battle. But if you’re “travel the world with” material, there’s a good chance you’ll be willing to wait.
Check out my blog for some awesome solo (while I’m waiting…) adventure locations and tips (MyLifesAMovie.com) or my Instagram, @mylifesatravelmovie!
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Just wanted to pop by and say I follow you on Instagram and read this article when it was posted not knowing it was you. It helped me get through an 8 month difficult period where I had only dated women but fell for my best friend but was scared and unsure and your article helped me pinpoint exactly why I had no choice but to pursue it. I am now typing this from an Airbnb in Prague while my now boyfriend sleeps next to me 2 weeks in to a trip we have no return ticket for. Your article is saved on my Facebook! Thanks!
Wooowww I really love the way you described it! It's so hard to find somebody "to travel with" and you described it so well.
Even the person you are looking for is hard to find, you wrote a nice description about who you are looking for :)
I really hope you will find him/her.
Haha thanks, I'm sure I'll find him eventually...got a lot of globe to cover!