via The Huffington Post, by Alyssa Ramos
While I’m proud to be a part of the millennial movement that skyrocketed solo travel out of this world last year despite societal expectations, I must admit that I don’t exactly do it because I’m “young without that many responsibilities yet” or because I’m single because…let’s not go there.
Anyway. My point is that I notice a few misconceptions with the idea of traveling solo. For starters, it tends to seem like something you need to say “F-it! I’m young, I don’t need a job or relationship yet, I’m going to go travel solo on an extreme budget and a backpack because that’s what you’re supposed to do!” Personally, I don’t believe in the phrase “What you’re supposed to do.” Who gets to make those rules up anyway?
What if you aren’t “young”, with little responsibility and a lifetime (AKA your 20’s) to figure it out, but you still dream about travel? What if you have a relationship, and it’s great, but your partner can’t or doesn’t want to travel? What if you have a kid, and a career, but you just don’t think it’s feasible to leave for a few days to go somewhere? And after living on your own for so long, what if the idea of budget-travel and backpacking sounds far less than appealing and acceptable?
My main question is, why does solo travel have to automatically relate to young, single, carefree people backpacking? Why can’t anyone, at any age, stage, or Facebook relationship status, go and travel on their own without feeling like it’s something they’re “not supposed to be doing”? Personally again, I also don’t believe in the phrase “What you’re not supposed to be doing.”
In all honesty, I don’t like giant backpacks. I think they look funny on me and they hurt my back. I don’t consider myself that young anymore either; I’m basically 28 going on 50, have a dog that’s essentially a never-aging infant, and pay my bills for rent, utilities, insurance, tax, and student loans for a degree that I don’t use. I’m also the boss and only employee of my career, and constantly worry about money and life just like everyone else does. But still, I travel solo, and it’s because I want to see the world, even if I’m not still at that supposed “exploratory stage” in my life anymore. No matter what I am or what I become, I’ll still think it’s Ok to travel solo. Here’s a few reasons why you should too:
You Should Travel if You Want to Travel
During my Inca Trail hike to Machu Picchu, I met another solo traveler; a 52 year old woman with two kids and a full time job, who was there because she “Wanted to travel the world before her knees start to give out, and her kids didn’t want to come so she went by herself.” Plain and simple, she wanted to travel, so she did. Sure, it may be easier said than done, but you have two options; you can sit around and complain about every excuse for why you can’t travel solo, or you can do everything you can to make it happen.
You Don’t Have to Give Everything Up
Even I don’t fully understand how people are able to quit their jobs to travel, since, I still work full time while I’m traveling. Kudos to those who do, especially if it’s a job they’re unhappy with (in which case I always will advise quitting), but for most people, giving up a job to travel isn’t exactly a possibility. But you don’t have to go travel for a month or more, you can still travel using the amount of time off that you have. You also don’t ever have to choose between your relationship and travel because it’s not like you aren’t coming back! I’m no child expert, but I remember hanging with my grandparents over long weekends when I was young, and staying with a friend was always an awesome treat! Also, solo traveling with your kid or kids is rapidly increasing in popularity right now!
You Can Make Things Work with Work
Unless you have a boss who absolutely despises fun and happiness, there’s usually a good chance at making travel plans work with your job. Everyone gets paid vacation days. I know that for a fact because of how many articles go around about Americans not using them. If you know you get a certain amount of time off, plan it ahead of time so that you actually make it happen. If your boss isn’t keen on the idea of falling behind or just really needs you because you’re so awesome at what you do, offer to work remotely while you travel, but only in the worst case scenario…you should always enjoy your time off!
There will Always Be More Money to be Made
I feel like a lot of people fear missing work or spending money on a trip because they think they’ll lose money or become instantly broke and in debt. Well, true, you’ll probably be broke for a bit, but it’s not like there isn’t more money to be made! I’ve heard people say things like, “Yeah but I have a car payment, insurance, credit card bills, and rent to pay,” and I’m like, “UM…and I don’t?!”
I am in the same money boat as anyone else, I just choose to only spend my money on travel, and accept being broke for a bit after I travel, because to me, I can always make the money back, but know I won’t always be able to get an experience back!
It Won’t Mean You’ll Be Unfaithful
I know sometimes that solo travel translates to “single travel”, but that doesn’t necessarily have to be the case. Sure, it’s great to meet people while you travel, but there’s no harm in making friends as long as that’s all you’re intending to be. It can be hard on a relationship if one person goes and travels, but you can make it work, especially these days with Skype, FaceTime, and social media! Many people travel without their partners, and it’s not because they want to see “who” else is out there, it’s because they want to see “what” is out there in general!
You’re Not as Unable As You Think
My mom just turned 60, she still works full time and gets loads of anxiety at the thought of being away from home or work even though she loves to travel. She’s given me every possible excuse in the world for not being able to come travel with me, but finally I got her to go to Puerto Rico last year. Suddenly it was like a whole new person took over my mom’s mind; she was snorkeling and kayaking, she even hiked to not one but TWO waterfalls in the El Yunque jungle with me! She kept saying that her legs weren’t strong enough, but once she actually got out there it was like she was unstoppable, all she had to do was try!
Many people also haven’t experienced being alone for long periods of time. It’s not as scary as you think, and in fact, there’s a good chance you’ll end up falling in love with it, and yourself!
You Don’t Have to Be Crazy Adventurous
Sure, I’m guilty of being one of the solo travelers who is constantly climbing mountains and hanging my feet off cliffs. But just because I’m crazy, doesn’t mean anyone else has to be! What if you’ve always wanted to stroll the streets of Paris and sip wine under the Eiffel Tower, or relax in the tropical waters of the Caribbean? You can go do that on your own and have a phenomenal time, without ever having to do anything terrifying or crazy!
You Don’t Have to Downgrade
Like I said before, it seems like “solo travel” sometimes correlates to “backpacking” and “hostels”, but that’s not the case. I can fit just as much stuff in a carry-on and spend almost as little as someone backpacking, while still managing to find good deals at nicer places. That being said, you also don’t have to downgrade drastically to keep a budget. I always find the best deals on flights and hotels because I do my research, and keep an eye out for special offers.
The Only Definite Time Limit, is Death
There is no age range for people who can travel solo. Granted I wouldn’t exactly encourage a 12 year old to go do it (then again these days, who knows what they’re capable of!), but I definitely would encourage anyone who is physically and mentally capable of moving from point A to point B. I’ve heard people say, “No, I’m too old now to just go travel solo,” and they’ve been mostly around the age of 35. I think they see solo travel as something you can get away with when you’re “young”, but once you hit your 30’s it’s all work work work and no play. But unless you’re on your death bed, it’s technically never “too late”. That being said, do you really want to be on your death bed wishing you would have just took the chance and traveled while you still had time?
Regrets suck, and no one ever said, “Man, I really wish I hadn’t of traveled!”
Okay, after reading this, I don’t feel so alone. My partner does not want to travel as much as I do, so I am spending extra time alone in Europe this year (I’m from Australia)to see places he doesn’t want to visit. This will be my first time travelling solo. Everyone has been telling me I’m crazy, too dangerous to go solo overseas in France and in the alps etc etc… But reading your article and seeing other women like yourself are out there travelling solo, confirms I have made the right choice – so thank you.
YES!! So glad you found this helpful! I love shedding light on the reality of solo travel and if I can do it, so can you! Can’t wait to hear your adventures!
Thank you Alyssa for all the great travel tips. I love your site! I am a 59 year old who recently got divorced, all grown up children, so your travel blogs are really helpful to a budget conscious old woman like me who is about to explore the world on her own.
Aloha!
I’m a married 35 year old with a teenage daughter… my husband’s idea of a vacation is sitting on a beach with a beer (which I’m ok with sometimes too), but I also like adventure. I started traveling with my sisters (both in their thirties) and in the last 10 years have hiked Machu Picchu, slept in tents in the Sahara desert, driven the south coast of Ireland, and snorkeled in the Gulf of Thailand. I have never thought I was too old to travel. Honestly I didn’t have the money to travel in my early 20’s… Also, I’ve never traveled solo, but it’s a bucket list goal of mine. And I may be one of the few, but I use every hour of my vacation time!!! Better do it all before I get “old!” ?
Hello Alyssa!
All good points. Just recently I wrote a piece on hiking solo as a feminist act and how you can do it no matter your age or fitness level. I’m 40 and want to travel and hike as much as possible… with full time job. It’s hard, but doable. People were shocked that I want to go alone, with a backpack and a tent and just … hike. In my age! (I’m not 90…) I hope more women do the step (if they want) – no matter their age, romantic status or job.
Find what works for you and hit the roads, ladies!
Ioanna (A Woman Afoot)
This!! Solo female travel needs to be more of a thing and I’m happy when I hear more and more women traveling solo. Keep up the good work!
Hey Alyssa!
I just wanted to say you and your blog really inspires me! I’m 18 and my biggest dream is to travel! I actually might be going to Kenya next summer and if so it will be my first time traveling out of country! I’ve never thought of traveling solo before? And I saw you do souvenir giveaways, and I was just wondering if you only have to have an Instagram account to enter into the giveaway? Thanks for your time!
Best of luck!
Thanks so much Ally, and that’s awesome to hear that you’re going to Kenya!! I’m so jealous! And yes, usually if I do a souvenir giveaway it’s on Instagram, but bigger product giveaways I also do on here! 🙂 Keep traveling!
Thank you Alyssa!
Bali will be my first solo trip! You inspire me. So thanks again.
Enjoy your next trip!
Whaaaaat!!! First solo trip in BALI?! GO YOU!!!! That’s so awesome! Please do tell me how it goes! And thank you so so much for your kind words 🙂 <3
Whaaaaat!!! First solo trip in BALI?! GO YOU!!!! That’s so awesome! Please do tell me how it goes! And thank you so so much for your kind words 🙂 <3
Whaaaaat!!! First solo trip in BALI?! GO YOU!!!! That’s so awesome! Please do tell me how it goes! And thank you so so much for your kind words 🙂 <3
Whaaaaat!!! First solo trip in BALI?! GO YOU!!!! That’s so awesome! Please do tell me how it goes! And thank you so so much for your kind words 🙂 <3
Love this article. 36 married and two little boys. I have my first solo travel booked for next month and i dont expect it to be my last. I was starting to get a little insecure about the whole idea of it until i read this. Thankyou x ps love the insta page.
Woohoo!!!! Good for you girl!!! I hope you have an amazing time, and do feel free to share or tag me in photos so I can see your adventure!!
Great article, Alyssa, thank you for writing this! You are such an inspiration! My husband is not really into travel, I have 4 sons age 11-16, and I’m 52 years old. I’ve been on girls trips to California and Mexico and those have been a blast. But after following your adventures, reading your informative articles and watching your helpful videos, I feel like solo travel could be in my future, at least it’s a hope and possibility! I just want to say, “you’re doing it right!!!” Making memories, taking lots of pictures and enjoying this beautiful planet are so worthwhile!
Oh you should definitely go solo Kim! I’ve met some amazing women during my travels who were taking charge and doing it solo because their kids or partner didn’t want to go or couldn’t go! The most important thing I learned from them was that they had decided to do it because they “always wanted to”, so live with no regrets! And thank you for your kind words 🙂
Love this, Alyssa! Exactly what I needed to read right now! Love following your adventures!
Aw thank you Jamie!!
I agree, I actually wrote a similar article recenty, you don’t have to downgrade that is not a must. You don;t always need a backpack, all depends on where you’re going, what will you be doing there and what you enjoy.
All very good points, but I would add one more – you don’t have to travel solo! Solo female travel is so trendy right now, but you can still have a good time and learn about yourself and the world if you travel with a buddy! The worst part of solo travel for me was that I didn’t have anyone to share the experience with and say, “Hey, look at that weird thing over there!” If you can’t find a travel partner obviously it’s better to experience the world than not, but I feel like there is too much pressure to ONLY travel solo! Do what works best for you!
Sometimes I find it so hard to find other people who want to travel as much as I do or people I actually want to travel with! I want to go on my first solo trip, but sometimes my anxiety gets the better of me! Your articles on solo female travel are so inspiring! Must travel by myself sometime soon 🙂 I also love your snapchats!
http://www.travelmatters.co/